On Mother’s Day, I went to see Thunderbolts again, after watching it on its release day the week before. As someone who has loved the Marvel Universe for over seven years, I can confidently say this was one of the best Marvel movies I’ve seen in a long time. Unlike traditional superhero films, Thunderbolts focuses on anti-heroes, characters who have done questionable things while they carry deep emotional wounds and trauma. This movie explores themes of mental health, depression, isolation, anxiety and the feeling of having no purpose.
There are so many moments in this movie that shows how these feelings can consume a person. I want to share one of my favorite scenes that really stuck with me.
*SPOIL
ERS*
One of the characters, Bob, is fighting against this force known as the Void. The Void has swallowed all of New York, trapping people in the darkest, most painful memories of their lives. Bob has already been overtaken by the Void, he is the Void now. It’s consumed him entirely, and from that, a dark being has emerged who begins to use the powers he harnesses for evil. Then there’s Yelena. She willingly enters the Void in search of Bob, and once inside, she’s hit with a flood of traumatic memories from her past. In the middle of all of this, she sees Bob through a mirror, she calmly asks to talk to him, then he lets her into a room he’s been hiding in. He tells her this is the most peaceful place he’s found. It’s his childhood room, up in the attic of his old home.
They sit together, and Bob opens up. He says, “I have these good days where, you know, where I feel invincible. But then there are a lot of bad days when I remember that nothing, nothing matters, you know?”
Yelena, visibly concerned, asks, “So you’re just going to sit here and let it take over?”
Bob sighs and says, “Well, there’s no use in fighting. At least I found a nice room.”
Then, we hear yelling from below. Through a gap in the wooden floorboards, we see a glimpse of Bob’s childhood, his abusive father screaming at both him and his mother. It’s a glimpse into the roots of his pain. The Void isn’t just a villain in this movie, but it represents something much deeper. It embodies depression, anxiety, self-hate, trauma, all the inner demons people carry.
At this point, it’s clear Bob feels like he can’t fight anymore. The darkness has consumed him. For me, this part symbolized how depression can push people toward suicide. It’s that feeling of being completely lost, convincing yourself that there’s no way out, believing that nothing will ever change.
Earlier in the movie, Bob had asked Yelena how to get rid of his pain and she told him to just push it way down. She walks over to him and says, “What I said before was wrong, Bob. You can’t stuff it down. You can’t hold it in all alone, no one can. We have to let it out. We have to spend time together and even if it doesn’t make the emptiness go away, I promise you, it will feel lighter.” Bob looks away with tears in his eyes and asks how she knows that.
“Because it already has for me,” she says softly. “We can find a way out of here together. Will you try and leave here with me?”
Bob nods. But just then, the peaceful room turns violent, it begins to fight back, with objects flying around them and a curtain wraps around their necks, trying to strangle them. The rest of the Thunderbolts rush in to help, battling against the chaos of the Void. Bob eventually leads them deeper into the darkness, to a room where the Void is. It was a lab, where they were testing on him, with a drug that he was told would make him stronger. The Void pins everyone back, everyone except Bob. He’s left to face it alone. It taunts him, telling him every horrible thought he’s had about himself, that he’s broken, that he’ll never get better, that no one cares, that he’ll always be alone. Bob tries to resist it then he fights with everything he has, trying to overcome the weight of his suffering. But the Void is relentless and eventually it begins to consume him. He can’t fight him by himself, he’s falling apart until Yelena fights back, the room begins to crumble, trying to stop her from reaching him, but she fights through to him. She grabs hold of him, refusing to let go. She keeps saying repeatedly “You’re not alone. I’m here.” Bucky looks at the others and says, “This isn’t right.” One by one, the rest of the team fights back and joins. They hold onto Bob, surrounding him in a group hug. Bob believed that he had to face everything by himself, he thought that he was all alone in life, and that no one truly cared about him. But he couldn’t fight it all by himself. What saved him wasn’t strength, but it was the people who cared, who refused to let him fight it alone. His friends gave him exactly what he needed to defeat himself.
This scene hit me on such a personal level. I’ve struggled with depression and anxiety for most of my life. I’ve been through trauma that has left deep scars and for a long time, I felt like I was drowning in it just like Bob. Watching this movie made me reflect on how hard it is to try to move forward when so much pain is weighing you down. It showed me something I wish I would have understood earlier that you don’t have to fight alone. So many people think they have to handle everything themselves that it’s their job to fix their pain alone but that’s not true. Yes, we’re born alone but we’re not meant to live that way. We need people, we need support, and we deserve it, no matter how broken we feel.
This Marvel movie displayed characters who have suffered through so much in their lives, who’ve questioned their worth, who’ve made mistakes, and who’ve carried shame. These characters were seen as outcasts or villains, but by the end, they revealed their true colors, people who desperately wanted to do good. People searching for purpose. And in the end, they found it in each other, they formed a family. They formed a team, The New Avengers. It’s not about who they were but it’s about who they choose to be. That’s something we all have the power to do. Everyone fails at being who they’re “supposed” to be. But the real measure of a person is how well they succeed at being who they truly are.
